Farewell, Farewell, Farewell

HEYYYYY
This is for last week, one of the craziest and most hectic week. Countdown to farewell assembly: 1 week.
Mon was rather alright, same as tues. There was nothing much that happened because we couldn't do anything also because the items for the goodie bags have not arrived & the emails had been sent out on mon night as well. Everything was okay and alright, and i just had to focus on my pw that's all.

Wed: the start of the crazy and mad moment. Rehearsal started and everything was in a mess and confused state. The teachers came in & it was for the first time their full dress rehearsal. Like the maths department, they looked really bad and unprepared ?? and we have many many teachers referring to their scripts, papers and etc.. like the performance is in 2 days but they are not even close call they are fine/ready?? Singing mashup was still rather alright, as the teachers are really harmonizing really really well & all damn teachers can really sing and play the instruments omg.. why are they so artistically talented??  and then we have a singing duet by two teachers, which jo called them the funeral song HAHAHAH actually it is hard not to agree, because they are just singing real monotone and i couldn't hear much shit that they sang, like i thought i was bad at singing but teehee, there is always people worse than me oh dear lord... & then there is a teachers performance, and jo named it the NTUC fitness HAHAHA. it was basically the teachers dancing to the same few steps in the entire song and it was really very basic steps though HAHAHA. but it was alright la and finally the finale aka the council performance. honestly, at that point of time,  i genuinely think the council performance was the best out of all please. We were the most prepared and we were also the group that praised the hardest. But that day was rather mad because there were still many things unconfirmed and that it was the first time all performers gathered together so one can imagine how crazy and hectic the entire situation is omg. Plus, jeevan had to design and write messages for ms yoong birthday and then he asked us for help. i couldn't help much also cause i was rushing for farewell assembly. there were many things i needed to take charge and account for. whenever anyone has a problem or a question, it was all directed at me and i had to settle them one by one. it wasn't easy, but i kind of enjoyed the process because it taught me to be rather decisive and be cleared with my instructions given. and because i was so anxious, i kind of raised my voice at nearly everything but there was just many many things on my mind the whole time so i kind of just rattle of everything that came instantly to me. sigh, and yes i offended chuken with my words unknowingly. yes i apologized that was really ignorant and brainless on my part but i am not going to give myself any excuse because it was somewhat a personal attack so yes, i acknowledge that is my fault. and then also, at the end of the rehearsal, my brain was all so jumbled up and when mr teo did briefing and etc, i couldn't register much so i ended up recording his voice and told myself to replay it the same night when i had to update my proposal. and oh well, because he was pissed at me, he kind of ignore me and walked away also, but oh well, me caught the hint so yeah. And when i settled my pw and farewell, i called him and then he finally told me everything since last two weeks. it wasn't easy but oh well he avoided talking about it the whole night and he don't even wanna talk to me about it so yeah oh well. and when he finally told me everything, i felt guilty about it sigh. i am at the wrong so i am  not going to comment much or neither i wanna talk about it... but sigh, i compromise weiran that night though.. weiran texted me in caps for few text & i even told her that i would reply her later but yeah, i didn't so yeap, i deserve her being angry at me. She was worried about me but i didn't get back to her so yeah. And i couldn't get back to her also i was so caught up with work for thurs and fri. sigh, it was really a very tiring week though hmm... but the one thing good was, me and chuken we cleared our misunderstandings and i apologised for my stupidity so yeap.

Thurs, we had a technical run because we finally realised how unprepared we were. chuken, tingkai, conald and alfred joined my comm and the backstage team. i didn't had to overlook anything because all this while, i was just taking instructions from the teachers. but when, the teachers were busy themselves and asked me to take over, i then realised all the events flowed, all my logistics, all the different works and tasks we have to assigned and looked after to ensure the entire event is smooth and well-executed. i started doing things from the top, starting with the maths department musical, and then dedications round 1, singing mashup, dedications round 2, singing duet, dedications round 3, teachers dance performance, and ms yoong speech and lastly, the finale, council performance. one by one, i had to go through each segment over and over again just to make sure all movements and actions are following as planned. i felt bad because i even got jeevan to go up to the control room to help me click the slides, when yes he doesn't have to be there at all. (but friends, i now have to do more work for orientation, i traded my farewell with orientation omg) i was so nervous, and yes i finally, got really scared and felt stressed about the whole event that i kind of started panicking a bit, but of course, i couldn't show it out because we have many more things that is more important and we have to get them settled and resolved first. i was really nervous and i freaked out a little inside, but i forced myself to be familiar with the situation and put a foot in all the segments. i forced a grew out from me and told myself that now, i had to get myself together and stop being dependent of the teachers. yes, i am the oic and i am supposed to be the one taking charge. slowly, bit by bit, i took charged of everything and in the end, i started making my own decisions and i couldn't be more proud for a moment, that for once, i can make decisions too. we went through the same process 3-4 times just so to ensure everything is alright & everyone know their own roles. And when finally everything ended, my brain was definitely fried and drained. i couldn't think nor process anything on my mind. it was everywhere, and all the comments made, i need to had them repeat twice or more because i couldn't follow or register at all. but thankfully, i went home with telepathic trio yay. and omg, i also needed chuken to say 2 times before i realise what he was saying omg. And that two omg, i am so so done with that two omg. they gang up together against me omg, but it's okay la, i rather they do this to me because i wouldn't ask for anything else already. (: Thankfully, i completed pw before technical run, so when i went home i joust focused on my farewell assembly programm lineup and settle all the remaining admin stuff. that night, i couldn't sleep. my heart was beating so so fast and i only slept for 3 hours before fri.

Fri, D-DAY. came to school really early because our theme was 'back to day1, orientation day' so what they did for us during orientation, we had to reenact it. so basically, we had to come school really early to do cheering for the j2s. lmao, went to main gate and kaihon came in from the main gate la. i met eyes with chuken and he was just giving me the knowing smile HAHAH. but he stupid la, he not wearing orientation tee omg, so angry and sad and disappointed ): and then he even changed to rock wall tee before concert, omg urgh i am so sad la sigh ): but okay, him aside, concert was extraordinary great and smooth because we just did it once more what we had practiced the day before. everything was on point and we only made 5% of fault but they are all still the mini errors which don't really add up to the major parts of the performances yay. after the whole concert, i was so tired and thankful omg, when everything ended, i was still kind of in a lost and still cannot believe 2 weeks worth of hardwork is really all over. i actually have this little sense of lost, and detachment and disbelief. i faced many problems during planning for farewell and i genuinely did a lot a lot of admin and paper work for farewell assembly this time, but when it is all over, it felt so surreal and i couldn't adapt omg. when i walked out from the audit all alone after the event later, i didn't know what to do and i became so free that i can't really adapt. i was so busy for two weeks, and everyday i needed to return home to settle farewell and plan the schedule for the next and subsequent days. plus, there was still some minor human dramas here and there but thankfully, i managed to resolve them before the week ended.
this farewell, i honestly gave it my best and my all because i was determined to make farewell assembly a worthwhile event for the j2s, a worthwhile experience for myself. there were many problems surfaced, many stupid shit i had to settle, many many events and details i needed to follow up and make sure, but i couldn't ask for a better or another choice. i really learnt so so much & i genuinely felt that i grew a lot in just two weeks. event planning always seemed very cool and surreal to me because i am always amazed at the event planner, but when i stepped into those shoes. it was a whole new world for me. i had never took up event planning because many felt that i wasn't ready and many also continue to doubt my working abilities. but this time, i was able to work myself up, getting things together and eventually put up a good show. but of course, i didn't do it alone. i did it with my farewell comm dream team, a team that relentlessly help me out a lot a lot. i could never be able to achieve such a successful farewell assembly without any of them. they were the ones that worked at the back without asking for anything and allow me to take the credits. given the choice again, i would took farewell assembly again and i am more than willing to try it all out once again. this experience gained was more than anything i could ever asked for & i am more than thankful for this opportunity given & the faith that was put into me (:
councillors taught me the spirit of 'we are all in this together' ;  mr teo and ms nunis showed me the ropes and all the behind stories that we never knew about event planning ; infocomm people taught me the technical skills ; farewell comm dream team taught me the importance of appreciating and treasuring each and every asset in the team & most importantly, farewell gave me a chance to bid farewell to the girl that was indecisive and timid, to someone that knows to make decisions and be confident of herself, and most importantly, never lose her sparks (:
i am thankful for everyone, everything that came together to put up such an amazing and wonderful show on 16/10.
thank you all, jieai thank you all from the bottom from my heart. (:

'it wasn't easy but i did it & i couldn't be more than proud of myself'

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