TRAMAtised Week..

Okay, wow so apparently, i am more than screwed friends, because i think i am officially warned about the stupid issue and i think i am seriously moving towards the real unhealthy side. Friends, i am not kidding. I think i am really really starting to fall for a specific someone and of course, i am seriously steering towards the certainly extremely unhealthy af and wrong side, without a doubt. Ang you know what is the best part, i think i just made the cray cray internal war much more harder by increasing and leveling up the difficulty so much more than before and i just gave myself the craziest and probably another internal homework that i have to complete before the year of this year, or maybe if possible before As. It is certainly becoming more and more screwed up and god bless jieai seriously. She jumped into the deep deep DARK (literally) hole already.

oh btw, mama decided to be the best mum of 2016 and she decided to ferry me everyday after school with the reasoning that i can save more time on traveling and look less cui when i reached home. And she requested for my timetable and yup, this is definitely monitoring me on a whole new level and nope, i am not going to dwell too much because the rant certainly can't be stopped :-) i have much more important issues to address, no time for stupid and dumb shit in life.

Mon: day 1 of trying to pick me up and it is already causing so much trouble thanks man :-)
Celebrated felicia birthday because to make up my dumb mistake from last week and i swear, it was one of the most awkward celebration ever?? jeevan didn't even bothering getting up from his seat wth lmao HAHAAHAH but oh well, she was the last one so we officially cleared the list??
Anyway, was feeling a slight of pity that i couldn't see him before i went home but i guessed all the breaks made up for it??? And we were this close of doing MA but we didn't had to, but i had this little wish that we had to do because 1) i miss MA 2) it is him.....
(i am seriously going down the wrong way so hard....)
Maths CA too, thankful it was alright and it is possible to pass but doing well is another thing all over again omg seriously sigh. And i got back my chi CA too, so i apparently i passed on the dot this time and can i say this is the first time that i actually passed a lit test or even essays wth??? hahaha, and i realise my mistake was i wrote too little wasted af la omg ):

Tues:
Human Geo CA, paper was okay but quite uncertain about some of my answers but overall, still feeling good about the paper because it is probably my best performing paper out of so many lmao
Morning, when i came to school i saw him all alone in the council room so i just went in and plotted myself right the seat beside him....He was thrown to do MA last minute because of a dumb person in general and it was the very first time that i watched him do MA, not me as the announcer of course. We have been doing it so much together that i never get the chance of seeing how he does it and all but sigh, first time watched him did it??? Was a bit sad when me no wear uniform, cause legit missing MA and tbh it felt so odd watching him doing with someone else, fml i call this overly attached working partner. And after MA, wendy goh called them and talked to them and that got me worried so i found him during break and yeah, found out that actually wendy goh was expressing her misses for them lmao hahah but thank god it was nothing serious omg but it was so funny hahaha!!!!
Nothing much afterwards and i left school at 4plus how wonderful :-)

Wed:
Bingsu date with chuken and i am feeling so thankful and completed as whole. Confessed so many shit to him too oh well...i told him everything regarding my recent concern and the great boy that caused me so much concerns recently woohoo :)
hahahah mam kind of know i went out to eat but she didn't question much so oh well. And seriously, Bingo is one great bingsu place and yes, i am going back to try all of your different other bingsu flavours i love the devil's bingsu we ate so much freak it was so so good i died omg 💜💜💜
And today is another i-cannot-stop-stealing-glances-day what's new right? :)
GP CA too and tbh, i am so thankful that i could write my essay because of him. So apparently, i saw and prepared the wrong questions for GP and was kind of worried but i saw jeevan in council room i went in and asked him about GP. He told me what he did and the points he wrote. And not kidding i ended up copying everything he said and took all of his points. Poor boy needed to do his physics work but he still helped me think of examples and research for me and i ended pu taking his phone and further research of other examples for all my points... jeevan you're still the best omg screw that girl omg seriously like stop rubbing my salt and repeatedly says the same thing over and over again and not helping me at all wth seriously omg rude af i cannot
love you jeevan thanks for being such a sweetheart even though you legit could have rejected me omg 💜💜💜 you're definitely so much better than some people i know omg thank YOU so much omg 💜💜💜💜💜
NE Dialogue session and i didn't fell alseep but actually it was because i slept during my break and so yeah
FREAK I LOVE MS TAN YAN YAN OMG
Maths lesson was so tiring and i am just so done with school so i just randomly, 'ms tan can we call it a day already' 20mins to the end of lesson and her next line was, 'okay la, we end here now'
And I was just like omg, ms tan are you for real?? i was just being retarded omg freak!!!! And before we left, she said to us that we much get an A, and yes i made that resolution, for my As i am going to make sure i got an A for my h1, doing it all for you ms tan really. I am so thankful for you,ms tan and yes, i am doing it for you, i am doing well for you, i am not going to disappoint you anymore because you're worthy of me working hard for you :')))
And wed was probably the best day, from jeevan in the morning to an okay GP CA to the loveable ms tan to bleh dialogue session & finally, my highlight of the day---my Bingsu date 💜💜💜
This was probably the best way to conclude my CA2 :)))

Thurs:
Passed him some lozenges because poor him seemed to be suffering quite a bit from sore throat omg :/ but thankfully he was alright yay!!!!
damn freaking tiring and i just hate my thursdays in general because it is truly the worst day of the entire week (and i have no idea why can i never miss lessons on thurs nothing really happens on a thurs wth???) but when thursdays are over, i actually feel accomplished and that i am actually able to achieve something in life lmao weird af
But yeah, thursdays are just bad and i hate thursdays fml
I hate thursdays so much but i always look forward to the end because i am always thankful for joel that i can just speak my mind and rattle on and on about everything and anything and discuss about him too :-)))

Fri:
Was supposed to meet jeevan today to hang out and have fun but nope, mama just had to come in and spoil all my fun omg :-))) she insisted of picking me up when wtf we fucking agreed that this entire month you will give it to me??? I was so fucking pissed off and annoyed i swear i cannot.
And i felt so bad towards him too because i called for it and i had to cancel it as well fml seriously wth rude af la. But i think i know why i am like that, mainly was it was him. Like i was actually quite excited to meet him, have fun and all but nope, all plans were dashed :-))) But he wasn't angry about it and he told me it was all okay and we can always fix another day but sigh, it was very last friday and she still had to take it all away fml. My life is legit left with nothing else anymore wow. Even blogging is done in such a secretive manner urgh
Next week is guides pop and i am already not attending invest rehearsal and the very last week is the track and field meet and hot concert and nope, i got no more fridays left friends :-))))
Anyway, i think i am kinda starting to like fridays a lot hahah, like pe is already good☺️☺️☺️and then omg, chi consult in the morning is just so productive and helpful and also physical geo star is also freaking enlightening omg i cannot freak i love all these sessions so much but sigh, because of timetable that's why they're all on fridays so i ended up can't end any early so yeah sigh pie...
PE lesson?? More like stealing glances lessons wth and i unexpectedly told pingxin and hidayah, okay i think i am done for the day already?? :-)
Could have ended the week better but nope, look what happened and sigh, i still somewhat upset about it and still felt that it was a pity oh well sigh......

It has been one tough week fighting against the stupid and wrong feelings in me, dealing with mama and her real unbelievible and unreasonable shit and yeah, trying to study and get my shit altogether at the same time. So tiring, goodnight and goodbye.

'Can the world just stop moving for a moment to catch my breath please?'

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